The low bass of the song flowed from his headphones and filled his ears. It was pounding. He was bouncing up and down, trying to calm himself. He let his hands raise up into the air, let them move freely to the beat. He still did not feel any calmer; the knots in his stomach and head were still there. He let his head shake and rock with the music. There was a bit of relief then, but it wasn’t enough. There was too much and yet not enough. He didn’t know what to do so he kept moving. Class was starting soon. He would have to leave his room and get to class, lest he be late. He would have to stop moving like this, and start moving like everyone else. He let gave himself until 10:30am. Class started at 12pm. It was 9:45am. This gave him plenty of time to prepare.
Turning the music up on his phone, Chris looked at what was on the lunch menu today. It definitely WASNT chicken parmesean like he planned for. Fuck, that’s on Wednesdays not Thursdays. Wait, was it Wednesday? Chris checked his phone. Wednesday. 11:15am. He still had time to sit down and eat. Sadly, it would not be the chicken parmesan. Chris really didn’t have the appetite for anything else. Maybe he’ll eat that later and just get some candy for now. He stepped briskly out of line and went to the nearest vending machine, spending at least 10$ on chocolate and skittles. He sat and ate while rocking his head slightly back and forth, careful not to get caught up in the motion.
11:35am. He had only eaten one candy bar; stomach was still in knots. He felt like he was going to explode. ‘Maybe i need to go back home,’ he thought. It never ended well when he felt like this. It wasn’t the hunger. He wasn’t angry. He wasn’t sad. He wasn’t anything. Chris just felt that familiar feeling of everything being wrong somehow. The usually comfy, fluffy sweater he wore on bad days was burning his skin. For some reason he thought it wise to wear socks, and he was paying for it. Chris felt as though his feet were covered in ants. The sleek, cotton leggings weren’t feeling much better either as he kept digging into his legs every few minutes to relieve the itching. Thankfully, Chris always had sunglasses in his backpack but they did little to help the feeling of “offness” he felt. He really couldn’t place what could be the issue. ‘One more song and I’ll be set.’ He picked his favorite song which, was the song he had been listening to since he left the house. Only this time he turned it up so loud that anyone sitting across from him could probably hear it.
Chris was sprintjng towards the lab where Lit was held. Fuck. Shit. 11:55am. He didn’t like being late to a class he actually enjoyed. Math? Biology? Intro to French Culture? He could be as late as he wanted. But he actually LIKED his literature class. They always had such fun discussions. The teacher was a little rude and her curriculum was childish and a bit too easy but he didn’t mind. So he really wanted to be there on time. 12:07pm. He was only slightly late when he came panting into the classroom. Most of class wasn’t there. Many had stopped showing up early as the weeks went by and some stopped coming at all. He took a seat towards the back and took his headphones off.
‘Ah, i really should have stayed home.’ Chris thought. Focusing on the lesson was near impossible. Someone had been chewing gum. It was the only thing he could hear. He ran his hands through his hair. He was hoping they’d swallow it and choke on it but throughout the lesson they kept on chewing. Another person had a cold and kept sniffling. ‘Why the fuck would you come to class with a cold just stay home SOME of us want to learn how dare you—‘ Chris’ mind was racing. His other hand twirled and tugged at his ponytail. The professor had said something about someone’s work but it was so hard to hear her over the sound of the pages of someone’s textbook turning. He’s going to miss the entire lecture at this point. All because these people don’t know how to sit quiet and listen. He was so upset. Why can’t everyone just sit still and list? Who chews that loudly? Are you a cow? Are you an idiot? When are you going to choke on it? Chris dug the hand without the ponytail into his leg. He knew he should probably leave but getting up was just as painful as staying seated. It took all of his concentration to get up and walk, almost sprinting to the nearest empty classroom. He sat on the floor and sighed deeply. He put his headphones back on and continued tugging at his ponytail. He didn’t want tk go back in there to get the rest of his things. ‘I can leave it. I have my wallet. Aaron can buy me more books.’
***
Chris left in such a hurry, that it was kind of shocking to Steven. The guy never left in the middle of class. Maybe he got a bad text? He DID look really angry when he came in. And everytime Steven glanced over at him he was wide eyed, in a daze. ‘Oh shit...maybe he’s high.’ Yeah that must be it. Steven’s had plenty of encounters with that sort of thing. One of his best friends was a pretty regular hippie type. When he was having a bad trip, Steven always had to help him through it. When the class ended and Chris Still hadn’t come back for his stuff, Steven decided to be a good samariten and bring it too him. Hey, this will make asking for tutoring much easier. Steven’s father always said that helping someone before you ask them for something is always guaranteed to make them agree!
With that in mind, Steven went in search of Chris. He couldn’t have left all his stuff behind in the building, right? If he did, it must have been one hell of a trip. After checking the building once over, he returns back to the lit classroom and stand outside the door, thinking. ‘Well, maybe he’ll come back for his stuff?’ Steven was considering just leaving it by the door when he saw Chris down the hall. Sighing with relief, Steven ran towards him with his stuff in had. “Chris! Dude! You left all your shit back there!” Chris had his headphones in and was looking at his phone.
“Chriiiiiiiissssss!!!” Chris nearly screamed as Steven pat him on the shoulder. There were tear streaks in his face. He looked like a deer caught in headlights. Steven back up a little.
“Whoa, whoa dude you ok?” Chris nodded.
“Are you sure? You look like ass—“
“My stuff.” Chris pointed at his bookbag in Steven’s hand.
“Oh yeah dude, no yeah here,” he handed it to Chris. “Dude if you’re like. Having a bad trip i know how to handle those my friend used to—“ Chris was already walking away. He didn’t say thank you or anything. Steven was so confused all he could was stare as Chris slowly walked down the hall. ‘I guess he’s just having a really bad day.’ Steven thought as he scrateched his head.
Chris did not come to class for a day or two. When he finally returned, he was his normal, assholish self. Steven almost sort of missed the quiet, doe eyed boy from the other day. But, after class he sucked it up and went up to Chris before he could corner a poor student into a debate about today’s lecture.
“Hey Chris! Can I talk to you for a sec?” Chris rolled his eyes and sat on a desk.
“Yes?.”
“Ok so this is really embarrassing but—“
“I’m not into red heads.”
“What.”
“I don’t like red heads. Sorry.” Steven shook his head, ignoring the comment.
“Can you tutor me?”
“No.”
“Aw thanks man— wait why?” Chris crossed his legs and looked up at Steven, his brow furrowed.
“Just because.”
“That is NOT a valid answer.” Chris crossed his arms.
“I don’t care.”
“Even if I’m willing to pay you?”
“Psshhh. Depends on how much. And even if you DID pay me, i doubt you could afford me.” He said with a smirk as he got off the table. He sauntered over to the door and wave in an overly cheery way. Steven was fuming. What the HELL was up with this guy?
Turning the music up on his phone, Chris looked at what was on the lunch menu today. It definitely WASNT chicken parmesean like he planned for. Fuck, that’s on Wednesdays not Thursdays. Wait, was it Wednesday? Chris checked his phone. Wednesday. 11:15am. He still had time to sit down and eat. Sadly, it would not be the chicken parmesan. Chris really didn’t have the appetite for anything else. Maybe he’ll eat that later and just get some candy for now. He stepped briskly out of line and went to the nearest vending machine, spending at least 10$ on chocolate and skittles. He sat and ate while rocking his head slightly back and forth, careful not to get caught up in the motion.
11:35am. He had only eaten one candy bar; stomach was still in knots. He felt like he was going to explode. ‘Maybe i need to go back home,’ he thought. It never ended well when he felt like this. It wasn’t the hunger. He wasn’t angry. He wasn’t sad. He wasn’t anything. Chris just felt that familiar feeling of everything being wrong somehow. The usually comfy, fluffy sweater he wore on bad days was burning his skin. For some reason he thought it wise to wear socks, and he was paying for it. Chris felt as though his feet were covered in ants. The sleek, cotton leggings weren’t feeling much better either as he kept digging into his legs every few minutes to relieve the itching. Thankfully, Chris always had sunglasses in his backpack but they did little to help the feeling of “offness” he felt. He really couldn’t place what could be the issue. ‘One more song and I’ll be set.’ He picked his favorite song which, was the song he had been listening to since he left the house. Only this time he turned it up so loud that anyone sitting across from him could probably hear it.
Chris was sprintjng towards the lab where Lit was held. Fuck. Shit. 11:55am. He didn’t like being late to a class he actually enjoyed. Math? Biology? Intro to French Culture? He could be as late as he wanted. But he actually LIKED his literature class. They always had such fun discussions. The teacher was a little rude and her curriculum was childish and a bit too easy but he didn’t mind. So he really wanted to be there on time. 12:07pm. He was only slightly late when he came panting into the classroom. Most of class wasn’t there. Many had stopped showing up early as the weeks went by and some stopped coming at all. He took a seat towards the back and took his headphones off.
‘Ah, i really should have stayed home.’ Chris thought. Focusing on the lesson was near impossible. Someone had been chewing gum. It was the only thing he could hear. He ran his hands through his hair. He was hoping they’d swallow it and choke on it but throughout the lesson they kept on chewing. Another person had a cold and kept sniffling. ‘Why the fuck would you come to class with a cold just stay home SOME of us want to learn how dare you—‘ Chris’ mind was racing. His other hand twirled and tugged at his ponytail. The professor had said something about someone’s work but it was so hard to hear her over the sound of the pages of someone’s textbook turning. He’s going to miss the entire lecture at this point. All because these people don’t know how to sit quiet and listen. He was so upset. Why can’t everyone just sit still and list? Who chews that loudly? Are you a cow? Are you an idiot? When are you going to choke on it? Chris dug the hand without the ponytail into his leg. He knew he should probably leave but getting up was just as painful as staying seated. It took all of his concentration to get up and walk, almost sprinting to the nearest empty classroom. He sat on the floor and sighed deeply. He put his headphones back on and continued tugging at his ponytail. He didn’t want tk go back in there to get the rest of his things. ‘I can leave it. I have my wallet. Aaron can buy me more books.’
***
Chris left in such a hurry, that it was kind of shocking to Steven. The guy never left in the middle of class. Maybe he got a bad text? He DID look really angry when he came in. And everytime Steven glanced over at him he was wide eyed, in a daze. ‘Oh shit...maybe he’s high.’ Yeah that must be it. Steven’s had plenty of encounters with that sort of thing. One of his best friends was a pretty regular hippie type. When he was having a bad trip, Steven always had to help him through it. When the class ended and Chris Still hadn’t come back for his stuff, Steven decided to be a good samariten and bring it too him. Hey, this will make asking for tutoring much easier. Steven’s father always said that helping someone before you ask them for something is always guaranteed to make them agree!
With that in mind, Steven went in search of Chris. He couldn’t have left all his stuff behind in the building, right? If he did, it must have been one hell of a trip. After checking the building once over, he returns back to the lit classroom and stand outside the door, thinking. ‘Well, maybe he’ll come back for his stuff?’ Steven was considering just leaving it by the door when he saw Chris down the hall. Sighing with relief, Steven ran towards him with his stuff in had. “Chris! Dude! You left all your shit back there!” Chris had his headphones in and was looking at his phone.
“Chriiiiiiiissssss!!!” Chris nearly screamed as Steven pat him on the shoulder. There were tear streaks in his face. He looked like a deer caught in headlights. Steven back up a little.
“Whoa, whoa dude you ok?” Chris nodded.
“Are you sure? You look like ass—“
“My stuff.” Chris pointed at his bookbag in Steven’s hand.
“Oh yeah dude, no yeah here,” he handed it to Chris. “Dude if you’re like. Having a bad trip i know how to handle those my friend used to—“ Chris was already walking away. He didn’t say thank you or anything. Steven was so confused all he could was stare as Chris slowly walked down the hall. ‘I guess he’s just having a really bad day.’ Steven thought as he scrateched his head.
Chris did not come to class for a day or two. When he finally returned, he was his normal, assholish self. Steven almost sort of missed the quiet, doe eyed boy from the other day. But, after class he sucked it up and went up to Chris before he could corner a poor student into a debate about today’s lecture.
“Hey Chris! Can I talk to you for a sec?” Chris rolled his eyes and sat on a desk.
“Yes?.”
“Ok so this is really embarrassing but—“
“I’m not into red heads.”
“What.”
“I don’t like red heads. Sorry.” Steven shook his head, ignoring the comment.
“Can you tutor me?”
“No.”
“Aw thanks man— wait why?” Chris crossed his legs and looked up at Steven, his brow furrowed.
“Just because.”
“That is NOT a valid answer.” Chris crossed his arms.
“I don’t care.”
“Even if I’m willing to pay you?”
“Psshhh. Depends on how much. And even if you DID pay me, i doubt you could afford me.” He said with a smirk as he got off the table. He sauntered over to the door and wave in an overly cheery way. Steven was fuming. What the HELL was up with this guy?